This letter was written less than two weeks after the terrorist attack on the United States - 9/11/2001, and therefore, the the planet Earth. People were nervous of any situation that could result in other terrorist attacks anywhere at anytime.

9-21-01

Hi there,

Today as I continued to struggle with the pros and cons of whether or not to allow Kipp to go to a foreign country and live one of his dreams, with a possible very high price tag attached ( his Life), I spoke to yet two more people, who shared there views as well and then I seemed to have such a semi calming feeling come over me, and the more I thought in that direction, the calmer I became. It was really weird, but I ended up making the decision that I had to let him go! I thought, if it's meant to be and he goes, he will be o.k. or if it's meant to be and he goes and something goes array, then it's meant to be. I could easily lose him if he were to stay, either through an accident of some sort, or lose my relationship with him on a personal level, because, anger can be a very deep growing emotion, which brings resentment as well.

I also came to think about (now pay attention, this gets deep) how that although, yes he was my son, I did not own him. he is a child of God and I only have him on loan, that if God was going to take him, he could and would at any time. So I put it all in Gods hands and felt more at ease, I could breath again, like one way or another he would be alright.

That said, and feeling settled I returned home to express my feelings to Jon. Now we meet at a cross road. he did not share my thoughts or feelings. So I let it go and think to myself we still have another week before confirming our decision, saying nothing to Kipp. He leaves for Karate class and comes home just in time to join us for dinner and rather solemnly says..."Because the man in charge of the tournament could not verify how many would be attending he has postponed the trip till next year."

To my surprise, my first reaction was that of pain and disappointment for Kipp rather then pure relief for myself, that followed not to far behind however. Nothing more was said at that time.

Later, as I drove Kipp to his girlfriends, I took the opportunity to express all that I had been feeling, he needed to hear this and understand the true struggle. As He got out of the car I ended with an "I love you", he told me the same and got out of the car. then he opened the door back up and leaned in and kissed me. As I drove away, I was struck with a wave of emotion, relief and gratitude as the tears rolled down my cheek, I thanked God.

I couldn't have asked for a better ending to this saga. (only one of many I'm sure.)

Love, Ginny

WALK IN PEACE AND PEACE WILL WALK IN!

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