Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems.

 But first a little look at the reasons for the gifts!   Click Here 

Rule #1: When in doubt -- buy him a cordless drill. It does not matter if he already has one. I have a friend who owns 17 and he has yet to complain. As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills. For that matter any power tool is a good choice. He may not need it, or know what it does, but it will look good hung on the peg board in the garage.

Rule #2: If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy him anything with the word ratchet or socket in it. Men love saying those two words. "Hey George, can I borrow your ratchet?" "OK. Bye-the-way, are you through with my 3/8-inch socket yet?"

Rule #3: If you are really, really broke, buy him anything for his car. A 99-cent ice scraper, a small bottle of deicer or something to hang from his rear view mirror. Men love gifts for their cars.

Rule #4: Do not buy men socks. Do not buy men ties and never buy men bathrobes. If God had wanted men to wear bathrobes, he wouldn't have invented Jockey shorts.

Rule #5: You can buy men new remote controls to replace the ones they have worn out. If you have a lot of money buy your man a big-screen TV with the little picture in the corner. Watch him go wild as he flips, and flips, and flips.

Rule #6: Do not buy a man any of those fancy liqueurs. If you do, it will sit in a cupboard for 23 years. Real men drink whiskey or beer.

Rule #7: Do not buy any man industrial-sized canisters of after shave or deodorant. We do not stink -- we are earthy.

Rule #8: Buy men label makers. Almost as good as cordless drills. Within a couple of weeks there will be labels absolutely everywhere. "Socks. Shorts. Cups. Saucers. Door. Lock. Sink." You get the idea. No one knows why.

Rule #9: Never buy a man anything that says "some assembly required" on the box. It will ruin his Special Day and he will always have parts left over.

Rule #10: Good places to shop for men include Northwest Iron Works, Parr Lumber, Home Depot, John Deere, Valley RV Center, and Les Schwab Tire. (NAPA Auto Parts and Sears Clearance Centers are also excellent men's stores. It doesn't matter if he doesn't know what it is. "From NAPA Auto, eh? Must be something I need. Hey! Isn't this a starter for a '68 Ford Fairlane? Wow! Thanks."). Note: If you don't want to fight the crowds please consider the easy to use CoJo Online Shopping Websites mentioned on this page.

Rule #11: Men enjoy danger. That's why they never cook - but they will barbecue. Get him a monster barbecue with a 100-pound propane tank. Tell him the gas line leaks. "Oh the thrill! The challenge! Who wants a hamburger?"

Rule #12: Tickets to a professional sports game (any team within 300 miles) are a smart gift. However, he will not appreciate tickets to "A Retrospective of 19th Century Quilts."

Rule #13: Men love chainsaws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a chainsaw. If you don' t know why - please refer to Rule #8 and what happens when he gets a label maker.

Rule #14: It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must be an extension ladder or one of those special folding ladders with special tubular construction and turns into several ladder styles and holds a 2,000 pound man.

Rule #15: Rope. Men love rope. It takes us back to our cowboy origins, or at least The Boy Scouts. Nothing says love like a hundred feet of 3/8" manila rope.

Rule #16: Clamps. Men can never have enough quick grip clamps. No one knows why

Rule #17: Buy your man Duct Tape. This is a man's most universal repair tool. All men know, if you can't fix it, duct it.

Rule #18: Why not take a few minutes out of your busy shopping day and find a video for you. While watching the action packed previews your tool man may cozy up with you for an evening of warmth!

Rule #19: If your man is busy redoing the kitchen with his new tools, well what's to stop you from reading the newest romance novel.

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Reasons to Love Men


They've got that comfortable place on their shoulder that's
perfect for snuggling into while we fall asleep.

They're at peace with their bodies, except for
maybe some minor anxiety over height, weight, and baldness.

They're enthusiastic about our bodies, even when we're not.

They fall in love so hard, once they finally fall.

Chest hair, forearm hair and the feel of a newly shaved cheek.

Bravery around snakes, water bugs, bats and flat tires.

Their unapologetic lust for a nice hunk of beef or chocolate cake.

Their ability to solve problems simply by throwing a ball around.

The glimpse you get, when they wear their
baseball cap backward of their inner Little Leaguer.

How tender they get when they cry, and how seldom they do it.

What they lack in talk, they tend to make up for in action.

They make excellent companions when driving through
rough neighborhoods or walking past dark alleys.

They really love their moms. They remind us of our dads.

They don't mind accompanying a woman to a party
even though she looks like a movie star and they look like the chauffeur.

Their near-endless appetite for discussing the ins
and outs of work and money - ours as well as theirs.

Their genuine ardor for tinkering with toilets,
changing oil and assembling gas grills - jobs any
intelligent woman can do but would be nuts to volunteer for.

They never care what their horoscope,
their mother-in-law, nor the neighbors say.

They rarely lie about their age, their weight, or their clothing size.

How awestruck they are in the face
of a Wonderbra or a homemade cookie.

How nice their butts look in jeans.

How nice their hands look holding ours.

Their face is a treasure to behold when
they give us a present they picked out

Their ignorance is usually amusing

They have a great sense of competition


They give great hugs, ( and always melt
our hearts when a sweet "I love you" is added)

Though they often try to hide it,
they're very tenderhearted and caring

They have an uncanny ability to look deeply into
our eyes and connect with our heart,
even when we don't want them to

They don't care whether colors match, but
are willing to be concerned if we want them to be

They give us a peek at the little boy
inside when they get sick or happy or hurt.

 

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